A different approach to the holidays.
How I'm preserving my sanity.
I love the holidays.
And yes, I’m calling it that. Get over it. I’m talking about all of ‘em: Thanksgiving, Advent, Christmas, New Year’s Eve—anything that happens in November and December.
I love the music, the flavors, the fashion, the markets, the parties, the movies. Bring on all the cheese and all the cringe around this time of year; I love it.
However, now that I’ve spent at least a decade navigating the holiday season as an adult, I can turn into a Grinch as fast as any of them around this time of year. Over the years, I’ve worked on ways to mitigate anxiety and stress during the holidays, and while I’m by no means an expert at it, here are a few of the ways I’m approaching the season this year.
Planning a date instead of giving gifts.
It’s been a really busy season for me and my husband. While we’ve gotten to spend a lot of quality time with family and friends over the past few months, we realized recently that we haven’t been on a proper date since our anniversary weekend in September. I know that there will be plenty of other seasons in life when “going on dates” is off the table, but when I thought about what I really wanted for Christmas, I just wanted to spend time together having fun. He was totally on board, so this year, we’re each planning a festive date as our gift to the other. I’m taking him on a holiday train ride through the Blue Ridge Mountains, and he’s taking me to The Nutcracker. And I cannot wait.
Giving myself permission to not be “festive” all the time.
Ever go to the mall all Black Friday/Cyber Monday weekend and get totally burned out on Christmas music by December 1st? Me too. At the same time, I love this time of year so much and try to savor every moment of it that I feel the pressure to only engage with festive content. However, binging on holiday content has the same effect as binging on your Thanksgiving dinner. And I don’t want to be so sick of Christmas that I can barely make it through Midnight Mass (one of my favorite Masses of the year). So among the endless relistenings of the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack and multiple renditions of A Christmas Carol, I’m listening and watching what I want to in the moment, even if it isn’t specifically Christmassy.
Saying “no” to what I can’t realistically accomplish.
In previous years, I’ve loved doing the Busted Halo Instagram challenges for Advent and Lent, especially when I didn’t have a consistent writing outlet. This year, I’ve had to give it up because of my involvement with the Catholic Artist Connection’s daily reflections series. I’m so excited and honored that a seedling of an idea I had at the beginning of this year has become a well-received project by our Catholic artist community. However, this did mean putting my own writing on pause to make sure all of the reflections get out on time (and if that sounds interesting to you, join us on our blog to see the reflections go live every morning at 8:30am EST!) If saying “yes” to an extra party or project is going to jeopardize your wellbeing—physical, mental, or spiritual—consider this your permission to say “no.” Christmas will not be any less special without that task, but it will be less special if doing it makes you lose sight of the reason for the season. (I told you there was cheese coming. Y’all signed up for this. 🤣)
I’m wishing you and your loved ones all the very best that this season has to offer. Venite adoremus.
Off My Bookshelf
This one’s pretty straightforward: I give my initial thoughts on a book I just finished. Also, there may be spoilers. Sorry.
Walking on Water: Reflections on Faith and Art by Madeleine L’Engle: A few years ago, I read Stephen King’s On Writing, which I loved, but I read it as a non-fan of his work—not because I think his writing is bad, but because I’m too much of a chicken for the horror-filled tales he excels in, honestly. While I gleaned a lot of wisdom from that book that I can use in my very not-horror writing, there is something special about getting a peek behind the curtain into the writing philosophies and practices of a writer whose work you love.
L’Engle is that author for me. I have a signed copy of The Twenty-Four Days Before Christmas my aunt gave me as a child (thanks, MC ❤️). A Wrinkle in Time was one of my favorite books ever assigned in an English class. At the beginning of Holy Week 2023, I was able to visit her resting place in the Cathedral of St. John the Divine, which is still a sweet memory of my time in New York. She was not only immensely talented, but deeply sincere. She took her readers seriously, no matter how old they were (which may be why A Wrinkle in Time got so much pushback from publishers before it was released.)
Over the past two years, I’ve worked part-time with people trying to master that dizzying dance between being a Christian and being an artist. In L’Engle’s writing, I’ve found both a mentor, a role model, and a friend. My only regret in reading this book is that I borrowed it from the library instead of buying it so I couldn’t highlight my favorite passages—and there were a lot of them!
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ - 4 stars
Want to see what I’m currently reading? Follow me on Goodreads!
Free Things That Make Me Happy
I started doing a blog series about this a while back and I still love the idea, so I’m bringing it to Substack! And for the purposes of not splitting hairs, my definition of “free” is “not spending money I haven’t already spent.” OK? OK.
Girl time. This one isn’t that deep, but I’ve gotten a lot of time with girlfriends lately and it’s done my soul a world of good. Y’all know who you are. Thank you. ❤️
Thank you so much for reading! Let me know what other topics you’d like to see from me, and I will see you next time.
